


Alone Together

by sweaterwearinlesbian



Category: Death Note & Related Fandoms
Genre: I wrote two, M/M, Multiple Possible Endings, Yotsuba Arc, mwhahaha, sad or happy you choose!
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-03
Updated: 2018-10-03
Packaged: 2019-07-24 17:27:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,719
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16179788
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sweaterwearinlesbian/pseuds/sweaterwearinlesbian
Summary: L and Light find each other during the Yotsuba arc. How do they handle the stress of the case and the stress of their personal lives?





	1. blind

What do I have to lose? 

L is not subtle and Souichiro doesn’t turn a blind eye. The first night it’s just the three of them, the elder Yagami turns to L and his son. “I know that you’re together.” Light sputters and L nods, clearly not phased. 

“We are indeed Yagami-san.” Light is a slight shade of pink but his hand finds L’s and he is a little less embarrassed. 

“I don’t disapprove, it’s just… L, how can you have Misa clinging onto Light like that all that time? The girl disgusts all of us but Matsuda.” Light looks uncomfortable at the mention of Misa but L is, as always, impassive and just a little bit dismissive. 

“While Misa does prove to be more trouble than she’s worth, she will be key in bringing down Kira, I know it. She was the second Kira, whether she believes it or not.” Souichiro was silent but his head nodded in understanding. L turned away from him, dismissing him in a subtle way. 

“Light-kun, I appreciate the display of intimacy but it is difficult for me to type with simply my right hand, you know this.” Light dropped his hand like it burned him and typed away furiously. Souichiro gathered his things and left with hardly a goodbye. L and Light didn’t need to say anything to each other; they already knew what the other was thinking anyhow. 

For the first time since they started being chained together, neither Light nor L speaks before bed. There’s a hefty silence, and it’s hours before it’s broken by L’s quiet sobs. Light hasn’t gone to sleep and he turns over to help his love. He takes L’s shaking body into his arms and lets him cry and cry. This, he doesn’t understand but for L he will try. 

The skyline behind them casts their bodies in a pale blue glow as Light pets L’s hair and soothes him the way he would Sayu when she had nightmares of monsters. He supposes the same thing is happening to L and it sickens him to know that he could be the monster L fears. He leans down to his the crown of L’s head and whispers their first ‘I love you’ into the tangled web of silky black strands. L hears him, of course he does, and whispers it back when he’s calmed down enough. Light wants to ask, but is content to have L lay in his lap, basking in their stolen moment of peace while the world is in its extremes. Half of them are partying, living their lives fully without a care and the other half sleeps on for a full day of work tomorrow. It is rare that anyone, let alone a couple, can stay in a soft limbo together, without words, and with the barest of touches. 

Light wonders if L wants sex from him. The thought comes out of the blue and sickens him. Sex has never appealed to him, it has never driven him. He had always made excuses but could he with L? His father had accepted lots of things from Light but this part of him… it would never be known. Being openly gay in Japan was risky enough: hell even being himself was risky enough. Light brushed the thoughts away; how could he think ill of the soft bundle snoring softly in his arms? L wouldn’t ask such a thing of him. 

Light woke up the next morning with fresh tears on his pillowcase and a steaming cup of coffee on his nightstand. It shouldn’t have surprised him because L often chained him to the bed in the morning to attend to his daily routines, but it touched his heart in a special way, especially after the mess their emotions were last night. L sat at the foot of the bed, pulling on his jeans. Light smiled at him. They greeted each other with a kiss and L reattached the cuff to his arm. Light wants so badly to ask, to know but he doesn’t. They both keep quiet until they’re greeted by Matsuda, early again and Watari asking if Light’s eaten anything proper yet and Ryuzaki would you like some tea? Another long day starts and Light is almost able to take his mind off of the warm way L felt against his chest.

The time comes when L unchains himself from Light and somehow it feels like they’re breaking up, although Light has reassured him multiple times that they aren’t. L doubts and doubt until Light asks if he can stay the night a week after they’ve separated. His mother will understand, he explains, and L lets him stay. His heart gnaws at his insides and his mind screams that this isn’t right, that he’s letting Kira into his home again, that he loves Kira of all people that… Light’s arms pull him out of his mind with a simple hug. 

Light is crying too. It surprises L enough to ask about it. Light sniffs almost pathetically and says “I understand that you think I’m a monster. I think I’m a monster too, but it’s too late now.” It’s as close to a confession as L will ever get and a part of him wants to use it against Light but the bigger part of him wants to become a permanent part of Light’s arms. The bigger part of him wants to run away with Light, frame Misa for Higuchi’s death and run to England or someplace else and burn the Death Note with Light watching. He wants wants wants so intensely it burns his throat when he tells Light that they could run away. He’s done data altering before, he could do it again. Light doesn’t ask where the thought came from, just smiles. “What kind of people would running away make us?” 

“Smart ones. We’ve always been smarter Light and I don’t think I can live like this. Something has to bend.”


	2. numb

“What kind of people would running away make us?” 

“Smart ones. We’ve always been smarter Light and I don’t think I can live like this. Something has to bend.” Light doesn’t answer L’s slightly desperate plea and they slowly drift apart. L knew it was too good to last. Souichiro notices and asks Light about it one night. 

“Dad, he’s just like that sometimes. I’m giving him space because he’s worried to death about Kira again.” Souichiro accepts it but the first and only night he and L work alone he asks L about it. 

“Yagami-san, I’m going to be very honest with you. Your son is Kira. I know this is hard for you to accept, just like it is hard for me to prove. But it is the truth. I am distancing myself from him because if I love him like I have been I may do something very stupid and endanger this whole investigation. It has already crossed my mind twice to just frame Misa for Higuchi’s death and be done with this whole thing, taking Light with me far away from Japan. If I distance myself from Light these thoughts will remain thoughts and not actions.” Souichiro is unnerved and silent. He leaves in the dark of night and as he dials his sons phone, he can’t help but wonder if Light loves L nearly as much as L loves him. 

That night on the roof, Light tells L about how Misa cannot be harmed; if L even thinks out loud about testing the 13 day rule, Rem will kill him to save Misa. L once more doesn’t use the information that is given to him against Light, and if Ryuk notices that L’s numbers have gone up he doesn’t mention it to Rem. Humans are so interesting. 

The task force is riveted on them via the security cameras when they come in from the roof. They don’t really care about privacy at this point; none of them have anything to lose, and Mogi isn’t here to object. Souichiro is curious even if he knows that they are trying to pry themselves apart. It won’t work, they’re two sides of the same coin. They wipe down as best they can, and L moves to dry off Light’s feet. Light wipes off L’s hair when he notices miniscule shivers emulating from L’s person. They sit on the steps next to each other and the task force watches with baited breath as their hands clasp. Light speaks first, quiet enough the task force has to strain their ears to hear him. 

“I don’t want you to die L.” L smiles, weary and soft.

“I don’t want to die either Light. But I suppose we can’t always get what we want. You know I can’t just let evidence like this slip past me.” Light’s voice raises although his face remains mostly impassive. 

“There’s got to be another way. You can’t just… just die and leave me here all alone. You know she’s going to kill you, so why won’t you just avoid it? The rule shouldn’t need to be tested anyhow if you just accept it as fact.” Matsuda thinks Light is crying but keeps his thoughts to himself for once in his life. 

“I know it upsets you Light, and I know you think I’m throwing my life away. But what if you’re wrong? What if Rem doesn’t kill me? Light, you only are thinking of the worst case scenario.” L turns and cups Light’s cheek and Light leans into the touch. 

“I’m just being cautious. I don’t want to lose you. I think I’d go insane.” L is silent and the task force nearly turns away. They’re quiet for a long moment before L looks around and opens his mouth to speak. 

“You know I love you Light but we can’t keep playing these games with each other.” The task force gasps collectively, minus Souichiro. “Run away with me. This is my last offer to you. I can wrap up this case easily if I know you aren’t Kira. I just… for the first time in my life I don’t know what to do or where to turn. I need you to not be Kira in order to love you properly, but I know I can’t prove that, only you can, and I -” Light breaks him off by kissing him. Everyone, including Misa and Mogi who just walked in, are engrossed in the soap opera occuring before them. 

“I know you’re uncertain of your whole life, but I’m not. I know my place. I love you, I pretend to love Misa so that Rem won’t kill the both of us, and to the task force I’m just Light Yagami, son of the chief, and potentially Kira.” The group of men collectively turns to Misa who is standing shell-shocked, her purse sliding down her shoulder. “I wish we could run, I really do, but too much is binding us to Japan. The case for one, but also my duty as a son and a ‘boyfriend’.” Light makes a disgusted face and L smiles. 

“I wish Rem hadn’t threatened you. You shouldn’t have to be responsible for the feelings of yourself and another.” Light says nothing and they sit together, still soaked, until Light stirs. 

“I suppose the task force will be wondering where we are.” He stands and pulls L up. The two of them walk slowly through the upper floors and into the elevator. Mogi, least likely of them all, has his wits about him and changes the camera to the one in the elevator. They switch just in time to see another searing kiss, this time coming from L. Light put one hand on L’s hip and the other on L’s shoulder to steady them. When they parted, they touched foreheads and smiled like everything they needed was in each other. 

“Get you a man who looks at you like Light looks at Ryuzaki,” Matsuda muttered just loud enough for the rest of the room to hear. It was only then that Misa was able to shake off her shock. 

“I can’t believe Light would cheat on me with him!! He’s absolutely revolting, how could anyone pick HIM over ME??” The group exchanged looks, none of them wanting to explain that it probably wasn’t looks that Light was interested in. Of course Matsuda spoke first.

“Misa-Misa, I’m guessing that Light loves Ryuzaki because he’s the best detective in the world! That’s just what Light values!” Misa pouted, but her face seemed to clear a little. 

“That’s not fair! He was dating me first! He told me he loved me first!” Aizawa is the first to dare to speak up. 

“Misa, I don’t like this, probably more than you, and you’re right, it isn’t fair that Light just went and fell in love with someone else when he said he loved you. But this is your reality now and if you love Light, I would break up with him and try to move on. It’s clear from what we saw that he won’t respect you enough to break up with you, so it’s up to you to make that call. Then again, it is your call.” Mogi wondered when their lives had become so accustomed to dramatics that dealing with a cheating boyfriend felt like a walk in the park. 

Misa jumped on Aizawa, giving him a huge hug. “AIZAWA YOU REALLY DO CARE!!” Light and L walked into the task force room with damp hair and new clothes. 

“What is going on here?” Mogi shrugged and continued working. The rest of the task force were thankful Souichiro had switched the monitor back to the four camera random mode it was usually in. 

Misa grinned and walked up to Light and L, getting far too close to them. She backhanded Light and kicked L’s shin hard enough he began hopping around in pain. “Light Yagami, I love you but you’re a cheating bastard! I hope L is worth it! We’re through.” Ide highfives her at her behest, bewildered by the sudden change in attitude. He doesn’t care about the petty affairs of a model and her boyfriend, but high fives are always nice. 

Since Misa leaves of her own accord, Rem is less tempted to kill Light. Oh how she wants to, but Misa told her that it was better for him to live and see how successful she could become as the second Kira on her own. L helpfully scrubs this portion of the video file when he and Light are going over them the next morning. Misa continues to kill, but as far as L knows, Light hasn’t. They’ve become closer again, intertwining like the perilous vines in a jungle, beautiful and deadly all wrapped up tighter than a bow. 

One night, the two of them start to talk about the future for the first time since they’ve cared about each other. Light used to say things like ‘when the investigation’s over I’ll miss working with you’ but now he says “When the investigation is over I’ll love to work with you.” There is no doubt in his sticky tar heart that he wants to be with L, even if for now it’s because of his desires as Kira. 

L knows that his heart is as brittle as fine china, which is why he keeps it locked away, hidden under years of practice in the art of hiding things. His shielded heart has but one key, and L wants so badly to give it to Light. This is part of why he has Quillish come with him on every case; so that L doesn’t accidentally smash his own cabinet. Quillish knows how to calm him, being a surrogate father in all the right ways. Quillish is wary of Light, of course he is, but he’s also seen how L looks at him. He is able to word his concern in ways that make Light think he is the one asking. 

In the end, it doesn’t matter though. Rem has had enough to Misa’s weeping and writes both L and Light’s names in her Death Note. They die in each others arms, in a loving embrace that doesn’t suit them. Cause of death? Heart attack


End file.
